Hello Friend,
How are you? Can you believe it’s April already? Seriously, where has the time gone?
One week of the Easter holidays has flown by in a blur of chocolate, brownies and bread. Older Miss made a sourdough starter and has been delighting us with baked goods all week. Not sure how we’re going to go back to store bought bread when she goes back to uni and we’ll definitely be having withdrawal symptoms at the lack of bi-weekly brownies.
When OM does return to university, she’ll be there for a month and then her first year is over. It feels like she’s spent more time at home than at uni and I’m wondering what’s the point? Yes, it’s a great experience etc but is the cost actually worth it? I’m not so sure.
I was the first in my family to attend university and started in the year fees were introduced. Back then, it was £1000 per year as opposed to over £9000 now. I needed to get a student loan as does OM now as unfortunately, I’m not in a position to pay her fees for her. I’ve given her the tools to budget effectively but it’s up to her to put it into practice and I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing.
This weekend, I listened to my brother and my niece talking about money. She is also at university but has decided to move back home at the end of her first year to save money. My brother said she will have to contribute £100 p/month to the household and she baulked at the figure, whereas I thought it was completely fair. I’m interested to know what others think – is this reasonable or is it too much? Bear in mind that my niece is working so this isn’t a figure that will leave her destitute in any way.
When I got my first job, I automatically gave my mum money towards the bills each month. It’s just what we did. I didn’t wait to be asked. But that may have been down to being the youngest and hearing the conversations with my older brothers and my mum over the years.
OM has shown me numerous videos of ‘children’ (twenties and older), working full time, still living at home but getting mad when they’re parents asked for a contribution to the household. They insisted that they’d rather move out than have to pay to live in ‘my house’.
Err… Whose house?
I’m sure those parents don’t recall their children signing papers to own anything.
Perhaps in a bid to protect children from the rigours of hard work, parents have gone too far the other way and done too much? Some would argue that with access to social media, people can learn whatever they need to – how to cook, how to clean, how to ‘adult’. But these are all things I learnt at home and things I insist my children learn now (much to their annoyance).
The sense of entitlement is rife. I see it at school all the time.
‘What do you mean I can’t have what I want, when I want it? That’s so unfair!’
No, honey. That’s life.
It seems less that they haven’t been taught but rather they are unwilling to learn.
Gosh, I sound old.
But it’s true. Why would they learn how to do something when it can be done for them? There are meals in a box with everything measured out for you so you don’t even have to buy ingredients or think of a recipe. There’s AI to write essays and answer their questions about life. There are even tools that will budget for you.
In a bid to make things easier, we’ve created a generation that won’t (because they can) think for themselves.
Okay, so I’ve gone off on a tangent a bit but that’s why I love talking to you because you roll with me on whatever path I end up on 😊
In short: I don’t believe it’s unreasonable to ask for a contribution to the house that you’re living in. Just like everyone takes part in the household chores, once you’re able to contribute financially, you should.
And parents? Let’s do our best to teach our children to be good humans who can look after themselves and others. As a just-in-case, I’m planning to live off the land somewhere, away from the AI-dependent generations to come because that is a world I won’t do well in.
I’d better go before I start ranting and gain even more grey hairs than I already have.
Speak soon x
You're not gonna believe this... 