Drive On

Hello!

How are you? You’re not gonna believe this but – we made it! Half term baby! Whoo-hoo!

Okay, so I’m a little over-excited at the prospect of not having to drive. Don’t get me wrong, I much prefer the comfort of my own car than being on the bus. At least there are no unidentified liquids on the floor of my car and we only have to deal with the occasional odd smell if Bubs lets one go… But to not have to drive for a week is fantastic.

You see, driving brings its own set of problems. Like other drivers who think that I, with a car full of children, want to race them (No. I really don’t.) Or those so desperate to get ahead of you that they have to dangerously over-take, just missing a car going the opposite way. Add to this the ‘driving-too-close’ drivers and the ‘need-to-break-every-time-I-come-close-to-a-speed-bump’ drivers, amongst many other kinds.

And if that wasn’t bad enough, along with ULEZ and the congestion charge, there’s also the dreaded yellow box. For those not in the know, the yellow box is a cross-hatch of lines usually found at a junction and woe to anyone caught in it. You will see drivers do the most ridiculous manoeuvres to avoid it – I too have edged as close to the car in front as possible to avoid the back wheel touching the danger zone. The last thing any driver wants is one of those brown envelopes from the DVLA telling you you’ve been fined.

The brown envelope arrives if you stray into a bus lane too, which apparently happened to Mr E. We were driving home one evening and Mr E veered into the lane with the bus-stop markings on it. Bubs piped up, ‘Daddy, why are you driving in the bus lane when you got two tickets last time?’

I raised my eyebrows and smiled. Mr E kept his eyes firmly on the road while I explained to Bubs that it was okay to drive over the bus-stop markings but not in a bus lane.

He mentioned the fines again as we stopped at traffic lights. There was a camera ahead of us spinning around and around so, of course, Mr E tried to use it to distract: ‘Bubs! Look! Look at that camera spinning!’

It worked. Bubs leaned forwards in his seat and watched the out-of-control device.

‘Mummy? Is that a camera for looking after people or to give people tickets?’

‘I’m not sure, son.’

Bubs leaned back in his chair pondering before asking ‘Daddy? Is that the camera that gave you your two tickets?’

Maybe taking the bus is less trouble after all…

Speak soon x